How embarrassed are you?

How embarrassed are you?

Before we begin, there are a few questions we need to ask ourselves.

Embarrassments are a major cause of crime in today’s world. In each of our everyday lives, there are so many who feel embarrassed, ashamed, humiliated and hurt.

Question is how important it is for us?

How do our embarrassments shape us?

Should humiliations be the deciding points of our life?

If you don’t avenge our embarrassments or humiliations what can we make of them?

There is also a thin line- which ones should we avenge and which ones should we leave out?

Whenever I meet people, I often make it a point to route my topics to this above particular question. Primarily, every single person I have asked this question has told me that we can either completely forget our humiliations or we can forget none, and that there is no middle path to it.

But, what if there is a middle path to it? What if we can know for sure what to hold on to and what not?

A vivid discussion would arise but, then answers to every vivid discussion are just the same.

A two to three liner solution!

Wouldn’t it be a far lighter world and wouldn’t we have more time to focus on far more important things?

Or are we weak and do we want to surround ourselves with small things- making pennies and a life out of a mound instead of a mountain?

Most of us live our whole lives in shame. The sense of shame is like a sense of guilt. It never leaves us if we have faced shame ever like if we have ever done something wrong, we always feel guilty. Guilt comes from our conscience straight and shame comes from our brain’s emotional center.

What is conscience?

It’s an unseen, intangible word, heard often. For some people, our conscience is synonymous with our soul. For others, its existence doesn’t matter. They feel what they don’t see does not exist. Strangely, some of them worship God but don’t believe in the soul. For them often, there is very little in between life and death thus.

Now, our conscience is real and it does exist and is scientifically that part of the brain which merges our emotional and intellectual concepts. Synergy is just not the only role it plays but our conscience often leaves its footprint on our minds.

Ahhh! How we battle our conscience day in and day out to take a step ahead is not unknown to many of us.

But for some actions don’t arise out of our conscience’s footprints, instead, they arise from the source of the problem.

Erratic actions come out of erratic problems

When erratic actions are judged by the conscience, we can bring them to a close many a times as the conscience is synergy- Conscience is always the truth, the gut, the mind, and the soul- a combination of every voice we hear inside us every day, every moment of our lives.

Now, when someone betrays the conscience, they gain guilt.

Similarly, when someone’s emotional center dealing with our egos gets hurt, they feel ashamed and embarrassed.

If I sum up embarrassment, I can always say it is the total of all our egos that persists in a weakened state at a time when a particular action hits us. The process is too complicated but I will try to simplify it for you.

I will go with a small example to show you how embarrassment acts within us.

  • Let’s say Trila is wearing a beautiful pink floral dress and she has put on the perfect makeup.
  • She looks herself up in the mirror and is too pleased with her image.
  • Trila walks out of the house and there on the freshly rained roads is a small dirty puddle.
  • Unaware she trips and falls in the puddle and the next moment she looks back at herself she is smelly and patchy. No one on the street recognizes her well and then all her ‘shocking’ is exposed.
  • She quickly gathers her wits, stands up to prevent those prowling eyes from scanning her body, looks at the laughing crowd for a moment, and runs back into the comforts of her room.
  • She cleans herself up externally but a mark is set on her mind wherein she connects some dots to that patch.
  • The patch mark in her mind is clean, clear, quite prominent, and fresh.
  • Similarly, she has by now figured out the errors that led to her fall and she feels and will keep feeling forever that had she not worn those high heels or dressed in that skimpy dress, things might have been different.
  • So the next time Trila goes out, she knows that she has to also look for a pit on the road.
  • She has to also learn to ignore those mocking jays, who, walk by you on the road and harass you for being incompetent in just one more thing.
  • But this is the hardest part; most people never leave you and even if they do their hushed voices keep replaying in the mind for ages- their voices never leave us. Mostly, their voices have hurt a neuron or two in our brain’s hurt zone and these cells take revenge upon the humankind that they house by never letting the human forget their hurt or death and thus, to torture you, they transfer the memory that hurt their kin into the longer more enduring neurons or nerve cells.
  • Hola! You are adopted and you will never forget that hurt part no matter how silly it might look after years of more shame and embarrassment piling up over that teeny weeny one that you got years back.
  • It now functions within your brain as a conditioned reflex, basically, a sudden response that comes to you whenever you face the same situation again in your life or even worse when you see someone facing it in front of you.

Here it goes,

This is your whole life cycle of yours and now, from this above explanation, you might have understood why we call our life a cycle- a never-ending round trip we keep completing each day, each moment.

What do you do? How do you deal with it?

Do you merely tackle it?

Do you spin with it again, again and again?

Or do you break it?

Most of us have developed a system of reward and punishment in this circular world.

All of us frankly eat out of this very cycle of right & wrong, good & bad, up & down, high & low in the world.

But some dream of breaking some cycles for sure!

If you want to break your cycle of embarrassment, then do read the next post next week or the next.

Fear vs non-fear and their consequences

Why do people mostly not accept fears?

Out of egos and also due to the wanton thoughts that fears bring with themselves.

The fact is almost every single person who has cried soon after birth is scared of this world.

Countries fight to hide their fears, and so do men.

Men try to find out more, and so do countries. Espionage is a crime but, we need to always know who is threatening our existence and living.

If we are scared, I asked a cognitive behavioral therapist, why is it that we cannot make a collective attempt to get over it collectively? Why does it always happen, that we end up destroying something out of fear?

She made an interesting point that I wish to share here. She said that it is since some people in the process of hundreds of years have learned to use others’ fears for their profit.

Mostly we try to preserve ourselves from such people who would attack us after knowing our fears and that we call them our ENEMY.

While discussing with her where she admits to telling me more only if I keep her away from it and on grounds of anonymity that an enemy is always not the one who acts in defense out of fear. It is always the calculative trickster who knows well to use others’ weaknesses for their benefit.

Destroying an enemy is not often possible, especially such enemies, as they tend to know well to hide their lunacy from the world.

This world can surely drive people crazy, and when someone knows well to use their lunacy, they become Gods, the all-powerful but not the all-merciful.

These are mostly those humans who can just not subjugate humans under them but entire nations, and even huge, tall, overpowering organizations.

What makes our fears big?

If we think along these lines, we will realize that since people are benefiting out of it, and now, of course, organizations, there is a chance that our fears will be ever-increasing as more and more people learn the art of using these fears to their favors.

Secondly, it also means these people would never let such fears from coming to an end as it is their very source of bread and butter. To counter them, there are even bigger organizations, more massive than a thin, lanky human, standing with torch lights to find these ‘fear reapers and harvesters’ and who call themselves snappers of fear and yet can’t mostly end them.

Does it mean their bread and butter depends on the fear spread by the reapers and harvesters then? If so is the case, it is even more massive for an entity to be crushed all at once.

Thirdly, we are moving towards creating more and more fears every day as more and more ‘fear reapers and harvesters’ as I would like to call them are coming up.

Or, shall I say they were always the biggest part of the world. Otherwise, how can it be that the ancient invaders of our country, mostly, the looters are some of the world’s richest men in their times?

Until the 1980s, we still lived a bit happily given ignorance is always bliss but now, with the rapid advent of the internet, even if we want, we cannot ignore the world.

The question that always comes up more than ever is,

What are we creating? By killing everything, replacing old with newer humans freshly alighting from their mother’s wombs, and by ensuring mass extinction of beautiful species of plants and animals?

Every day, I ask myself this question while living through my fears while telling myself every day that there is nothing to fear.

But when I look at the world it seems small only to be made an ominous looking ball by the billions of minds that work together day in and out, night in and out.

If it had been small and, if we had not moved these ways that we have moved over millions of unnamed civilizations, where would we have reached by now?

Would our destinations have been the same whether we lived or not this way?

“Living fear-generating machines?”

Today fear is a necessity, and we are dependent heavily on fear for our survival. But this was not the case, millions of years behind us. So, I presume, given we are living today on said histories and norms.

Is there a result for fear vs non-fear

Time runs forward, and everything we measure is relevant to the time we are in today thus, everything that happened or will happen will seem to be happening in the past.

But what if there is no past in time as there is no future and everything that is happening around us is all a circle just like the one on which we live?

I do not wish to create new physical laws, and neither challenges the vivid understanding of our fellow humans who strive each day to make meaning of this vast Universe but, I just wonder. Could it be that we have written what we are living today?

If we have parallel timelines, can it be that one is writing and the other is living it? Could it be that one is shifting their fears upon us and we are making it a business while some version of ours in the parallel world is just living a peaceful world?

Well, I did see the films well, not to mention the Sorcerer and the Scarlet Witch quite attentively.

In such circumstances, then there is still hope as hypothetically, we have to just start moving away from fear, and in doing so we move towards the better world and merely by doing so people now earning from fear will also be eligibly earning from non-fear (cannot call it courage since the absence of fear is not courage but non-fear).

Hypothetical consequences of fearless living

If for a moment, the whole world ceases to be afraid and does what is right; can we not bring back all our greatest leaders or their clans, generations, and lineages who can drive our life on a better path?

Lord Rama’s clan, Christ’s clan, and the likes of our great Shivay, apart from many great souls who tried with even their sacrifices to turn people from fear. But what did we do, we ceased our understanding and killed them and their visions by dynamically shifting our thoughts from non-fear to fear.

What guides us more than nasty humans must be a force big enough to fear, and by bringing the great men back in the equation can we still not save our Earth. Our Gods don’t however need help, as they will live in their micro niches till we leave only to come back and conquer it, to replenish this tired Earth, to make it a home for the remaining humans.

Since then, there will be no one to stop them to shift the scales towards the positive side, and reviving Earth is a science they have long mastered.

But what will happen with the majority is yet to be seen?

Caressing the world

If you care for the world,

Do something about it.

If you care for your family.

Live to make something for it.

When you desire something for yourself,

Stand to live up to it.

Journeys are never easy.

A lot of them are tougher than you think often,

Making sense of this world takes time, courage and patience.

Living takes matter and the matrix both.

So, next time you wish to live for something or someone,

Merely stand up and try your best.

You may not win it from the world,

people may not permit your rise,

but no one can blame, you never tried.

A desire to understand if what glitters is gold

I am often bound to think about everything that shimmers, glitters, and glows in the world?

Most people I asked came back with the same answer- the best advertised product is what shimmers and hence sells.

But then a question props up, ‘if what glitters is gold then there is a lot of chaff that glitters too.’

In my quest to understand the world, it would be unwise to say that I am not a dreamer. But who wouldn’t want to dream of colorful clouds making way for men and animals alike with the world being frosty clean heaven? Well, whoever knows how to dream would love to escape to those lands now and often? But, what about those who have never learned to dream!

“What survives is what lives!” My grandmother told me once.

“It’s enough if you can even survive this world.” A realist would tell you every day when you meet them on the streets.

Are realists more than optimists in the world today?

Can the doom we find around us be primarily attributed to this magnetic shift that we right now encounter in this world?

It is imperative to note that we do see a rise in the number of soothsayers versus an equal rise in the number of sooth slayers in the world today. No one needs an affirmation more than the social media where one post talks of never losing hope, and just the next one speaks of the advantages of not letting hope destroy your world.

However, the increase in the number of life coaches, white witchcraft practitioners, tarot readers (with their effable versions and visions of the world you might encounter everyday), painters, job switchers, fragmentalists, dramatists (for those of them who practice drama every minute of their lives till they breathe), and avid Ayurvedic and Yoga practitioners point out to the steep rise in the number of confused listeners in today’s world.

The rise in optimist fulcrum points and focal centers clearly shows how devoid the rest of the world is becoming of optimism. Realism is removing the veils that help build a child’s psyche and develops their imaginative envelop or bubble as many may prefer calling them.

It is true that realism is good but calling a dead man, a dead body is not making the world any better. But arguably the rise in everything else that seems to challenge human existence unlike never before is creating fizz and most often realism is an answer to it and the best way to counter it often.

Realism leads us the right way in this world where almost everything is made to glitter nowadays.

I often as a child loved playing with stones and even today they are dear to me. Whenever I pick up a stone, I fail to realize if all that glitters is so beautiful then why do the stones look so pretty, even when they don’t glitter.

When I walked down the river bed, I felt what we are looking at is not gold and neither glitter but a chaotic magnetism that pulls around it a web of shinier objects which keep buzzing and whirling around it. This kind of bewitched rhoticism guides almost every phase and step of our life.

How to be away from it?

Should we like it or hate it?

Questions keep blurring my judgment as each minute this particular action is on the rise. Every single day there is a rise in the number of people who worship everything that glitters in this world.

 Is this a result of the failure of implementing the right judgment in our children?

Does it happen since men are not taught to distinguish gold from other non-precious glittering objects? Did men forget to teach their kids the difference between gold and gunmetal?

But, I often wonder if people are deliberately losing out on this information to increase the warp of chaotic magnetism more.

What is the resultant force

While walking down the same riverbed, watching the setting sun and realizing & relishing the cool breeze, I was suddenly hit by the thought that those who do not follow this flow now can be lost faster than those who are following it. But when water flows downstream one wave is indistinguishable from the other sooner or later.

Were they merging into bigger waves and losing their identity deliberately or were they being forced to merge with each other, was hard to say from where I stood.

Even that was death whether gobbled willingly or unwillingly like the death that came from not following the waves downstream.

By far, the strongest force, death never discriminates against one another as death is the virtual end of a being in this world.

If death does not discriminate shinier objects from the non-shinier ones, why even glitter in the first place?

Be like the stones instead? Non-shiny, non-sticky with less garb to stick around!

I also realized as I set to write this article, that no matter what, nothing can change human existence singularly, and it is always all together that the fate of the entire world can sift.

However, flowing around many foci was never an answer. Thereby, trying to glitter or shimmer in different ways around independent foal points will not yield the results one might expect to get if that is not who they are.

Changing beings from one form to another is hard, and a discussion kept certainly for later.

Twisted World

The world is twisted by all means.

I am often not sure of my ends and also my means.

If life is chaos condensed tight,

What is best to make the chaos within right?

If all is order and hope,

Why do people as though in darkness grope

their way through nothing?

After all, life should be something!

But, what can life be, except merry making and celebrating

this ever voluminous nothingness.

Meandering through a series of telemarketing,

we reach within us a willingness.

To live till the end until we bend

For reasons that flash on the world wide web as the newest trends.

The Beginning of Water- Chapter III

His name was Golmak and he was named after two words- Gol (round) in the Hindi language as his mother was an Indian and there were very few Hindi words his father picked up from her and one was the word Gol meaning round and he combines it with another word, Mak in English. Mak was Golmak’s deceased uncle’s pet name, someone his father never forgot.

Soon after he was born, his father Robin realized that the world was serving him no good. So, one fine day he eloped with his ship alone when Golmak was just three.

His mother was a brave woman and raised him single-handedly only with occasional support from her sister and brother. All of them lived on a small fishing island called Minicoy where the water would rise and fall like the tides during the day and night. But when he was celebrating his twelfth birthday with a few friends by the sea with a pot full of cooked fish, he spotted his father’s ship returning towards the harbor. He had seen photos of the ship in his father’s study that had more books than the whole of Lakshadweep perhaps.

Reading the right books from his father’s library made him a failure in real life.

With no interest in sports, he tried hard to cope with his classes and his life turned out such that he would fail in one subject every term.

Sometimes he sat by the sea crying loud at his bad luck. But the sea seemed to be the one laughing at his tears. The sea spoke and blabbered and Golmak never understood it.

Sometimes, the see would touch his feet, or his cheeks and whisper in his ears but Golmak had not learned to hear the waters yet.

When he went home, he learned that his father had come to take his son with him to the Sea. His mother begged to accompany Golmak and only when Golmak stood by his mother did his father admit her journey.

Since then, Golmak has rarely been off the waters as he became a marine having failed to enter any of the defense wings of the country.

By the time he was 18, he had realized that failure was his only stable best friend. If he ever did not fall from the rocks on which he sat to catch schools of fish passing by, he knew something terribly wrong would follow in the remaining part of the day, such was his trust in failure now.

“Good, you never went to school that way,” his father patted his back one fine day when the Sun was bright and the wind was saltier than other days.

Golmak looked up to his father hoping to know why it was good for him.

“You see we catch schools of fish and people turn bright boys like you into idiots in man-made schools. Both processes have a strange similarity. Isn’t it?” His father guffawed down the rocks as Golmak stared blankly, not quite sure of what he heard.

He never could convince a girl as all he saw in them were flaws and none was close to his mother’s perfection ever. He had no interest in any human in any way and instead, he was more into understanding what he needed from a relationship.

It so happened that while meandering through the seas and oceans with his troop, he landed on many lands but nowhere did he find that soul or heart he wished to make his own.

Until the age of fifty, he tried but his hopelessness gave way to nothing.

As a marine, he did well but with very little scope of failure, he had a hard time training himself to lead such a life. On holidays when he came home to a frail mother and a tottering father, he was managing and repairing his ship or was in the waters again. His father had set up a good business and they trade everything from one land and sold or carried it to another land for a fee. Mostly acting as a cargo ship, there were only two instances when his father smuggled innocent lives out of places and put them in different lands. Those men remained loyal to him and their tribes promised his father generations of support.

But now that Golmak was forty five, his father had little hope of having another generation. Despite constant coaxing from his father, Golmak could never become the man, women meet everyday on the streets. No woman ever found his beauty and now he wished to remain single as that suited him- a queer, most termed him as in his ship.

But he was a man who could not be fairly defined under the umbrella term, he somehow felt within himself. However, he kept it to himself letting the world think what they wanted as it was nothing that bothered him in any way.

The Beginning of Water-II

On one hand, we see the strong rise- survival of the fittest and on the other, we find the weaklings rise too once in a while. Reading this line, do not jump to a conclusion as in today’s world, most weaklings shine from the light of the strong- the Moon shines from the light of the Sun.

That leaves me with one question- what about one’s inner light? What about it? Does it mean Darwin was right or does it mean there are exceptions? I would say there are exceptions and in some such exceptions, though they are just a few- somewhere one in 100 years or more, maybe one shines in their own light.

That might make you wonder what happens when too many of such people shine from their own light.

Does it mean a second Sun finally comes to light?

I still repeat such instances are like a quintessence of dust in this big bad world where the buffalo belongs to the man holding the stick.

Well, quintessentially!

Now our story is not about strong men and women as they shine through their lives. Our story is about a weak failing man who has never had one in life. Some people give up too early and those who do should go through his list of failures if they lack inspiration.

Well, here is a failing man who manages to live one day from the other.

Afterward, there will also be a woman who will live through her failures one after the other. Definitely, she suffered less than the man of our interest here for sure.

So this is man is not ordinary but unnecessarily ordinary.

Born to nooners, who fathom to be someone and live life through a dream, our protagonist found it extremely difficult to keep pace with what went around him in reality and the stuff that covered his thoughts and imaginations.

Even though he was never proud of his parents, he knew he could not ignore their contribution.

The path to peace and happiness is a path of feigned imaginations and dreams. All you have to do is spend sometime inside your head imagining whatever suits your fancy and you can be happy even when in rags.

So basically our young boy (whose name is right now not important) understood that happiness and peace were as sham as war and sadness. Nothing was real and so you could actually make anything of anything.

“A true alchemist.” A monk had once highlighted while he was trying to make his point in a busy street of Shanghai en route India. A lot he realized happens in this country which no one is really aware of, and when he found out the reason, he found it to be something as simple as population. it was population and its steep rise that ensured no one was noticing well what the other was doing and to remain hidden to carry out his work, he knew there could be no better place than these.

He knew he was not an alchemist but he knew that all that he grew up with was not true either. So, the next thought that surrounded him was “what is truth then?”

Is truth a constant? What about Ram, Vishnu, Shiva, Jesus, Prophet and the Fire. Why were they teaching order and constancy as truths rather than change to be the only truth.

He often wondered if a shepherdless herd of sheep would be too influenced by the rotation and revolution of the Earth that they would also start rotating and revolving in their own axis- is it the reason why people miss to see the constant- the obvious and it is thus, they believe there is no constant.

Is it true, that a man who never leaves the train always describes the outside world as fuzzy and blur?

Or is it a variable?

For Earthlings like his mother and father taught him that truth was a variable, ever-changing, nothing was constant here and that change was the only constant.

That puzzled him, rather scared him, since, if truth was ever changing, it would mean it was like sand, and no one can really build castles on sand.

The Beginning of Water

Chapter I

Not long ago, we were unaware of the matter, and its creation; anti-matter and its creation too. It is only of late that we know a lot about the matter and a bit about anti-matter.

But despite all our efforts, life forms and their patterns seem to be moving in never-changing circles all along since the very beginning of human consciousness of time.

We all often begin our stories by saying, “at the beginning of time.” But, it is never the very beginning when humans existed the way they do now, so when we use the phrase, “beginning of time” we are imagining too highly about ourselves, given the memory of our past is no longer intact and almost lost except for a few people.

We all wonder, at least once in our life about the beginning and end of it all.

Most of us do it subconsciously and some of us are bold enough to do it consciously. This very world that is too busy to run from one day to another does not want to know what lies past us or what lies ahead of us.

Some of us though conjure ideas about our past, mostly our immediate past by reading fossils, or books, strips of paper even.

It is not today that the world is like this, the way it is. In fact, it was designed this way for fulfilling many purposes at many levels. The Neanderthals indeed existed and in fact, even Homo habilis existed too. Charles Darwin and his theory of evolution are true and those people who say he was wrong to miss the whole point and go all the way round to drop to that conclusion.

But here we will talk more about how all this came together, now that we know Charles Darwin was never wrong, and nor are our friends who oppose Darwin’s theory vehemently.

So how did it all begin?

The story here begins with the story of water and soon we all will move from water to the story of fire, lands, air, and then space.

Roll the drums and play the strings as we sing together the story of our past.

How do you connect better to yourself

We are fast paced, undoubtedly!

But if you don’t know how to think right, how do you think, you can keep up with the fast pace?

One after the other tiny errors will push you backwards.

Why don’t we try to see if there is a way to think better?

Is there really a way? Ohhhh Myyyy Godddd!!!

Good news is, there is one!

To think better, you need to think of your mind as a house or home with separate rooms. Thinking is everything, of course!

If you can think better, you can live better!

Are you convinced or do you need a bit more coaxing?

If you need a wee bit more push, let me know in the comments section and I will be happy to help.

The first thing is to know what all types of thought processes make way into our mind.

  1. Non-essential thoughts
  2. Essential thoughts
  3. Futuristic thoughts
  1. Non-essential thoughts imply simple jargons, that come and go.

For example, juicy gossips, our fears, competition, pride, ego, and any of the sins.

Yes, they are jargons!

Are you asking me why?

Well, you don’t need them to survive through your days- as simple as that!

2. Essential thoughts are what save you throughout the day.

What to wear, how to talk, where to go for your lunch are some to start with!

I am sure we know how these thoughts look like for each of us.

3. Futuristic thoughts are those that help us to live better.

Have you ever come across people you secretly think are not smart enough? Well, why would you think that way about a person, when we all are so full of follies?

The reason being, your ability to understand that the person in question, does not have a vision for his life and lives day in and day out.

It means they are not doing futuristic thinking.

They are the people in the crowd who are too busy with their small or big lives and are not seeing the future ahead.

Unfortunately, not many of us acknowledge that such people might be lacking the knowledge of the futuristic thinking technique.

Yes, surely there are some more who simply don’t do it as they are too lazy to think beyond their comforts.

The next best step here is to know how to think.

90% of studies show that all three kinds of thoughts flow through us, but what people actually are not taught is how to catch them to keep them together.

If you think you fall in that category, then take up a pen and paper or carry your note app or your mobile.

Start jotting down all those thoughts that can help build your future better.

Like I gave an example, in my Instagram handle @Sne8798 the other day.

If your thought is related to learning or knowing the better communication technique with a person you don’t want to loose touch, write down in your notepad immediately, whenever the idea pops up.

You need not think it through the moment it comes to your head, as of course, you are busy.

So, just write communication………………..with Mr.X or Ms.Y and leave it there.

Keep jotting down all such points as they crop up in your head every now and then.

After you are done with your day’s work and have some time, pick up this paper and choose that one point you think is the most important of all…..now think it through…

Your mind is sharp enough to understand and rank even these thoughts to create a priority list for you.

Once you start doing it, you will be ahead of many.

So this is the first tip on what or how I start my poetry course.

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